Summer buddies

M: Janelle is on her third year at the university. She has had a crush on Dino since they were in high school. But it seems like he’s more interested in Eric, another high school friend. Dino and Eric are going to Siargao this month and she’s jealous. This I have to say: girl, stop being jealous. You have no right and it’s a waste of time. If you don’t get real and admit that Dino is never going to be into you, you’re going to crash and churn under the waves of anger or misery while they surf the waves in Siargao. Dino obviously likes Eric. I know this might come out inappropriate but they’re going to be hot and wet with the sea, sun and sand in Siargao. So, chill your feelings for Dino.

DJ: Janelle’s heart will potentially break into a million or even a billion pieces if she continues to pout over what she knows they will do this summer. Whether Dino is gay or not is not for us to figure. That’s his personal choice. This is a case of an unrequited love. Yup, moping about him going to Siargao with Eric is a colossal waste of time. It’s human to love someone who doesn’t love back but she’s got to rescue herself from being a damsel in distress and enjoy the summer.

M: A high school crush is unforgettable. Being in the throes of adolescence, feelings are magnified, emotions are electrified and for some, it’s the first time they have tried “falling in love.” One never forgets the first guy (or girl) that made one’s heart beat a bit faster than normal. But Janelle, you’re in college now. You have more options. You are supposed to be more mature and you can discern better. I know it is good to be hopeful and have faith, but in this case, don’t pin your hopes too high on having Dino look at you differently now that you are in college when he feels differently for Eric and his preference is different from what you expected.

DJ: Of course, her feelings for Dino won’t just magically dissipate. It is okay to grieve over it as long as she doesn’t stay stuck. I can’t give her a timeline. It’s up to her when she’ll decide to move herself forward. Now if ever she’s considering making him love her, I can tell her that the likelihood for it to work is from zero to minimal. I know she can’t completely control her own feelings either, but she can work in controlling her responses to those feelings. Janelle can consider expressing her emotions through creative pursuits like writing, music, art or immerse in a favorite hobby. Hey, it’s summer! For sure, there are lots of other people she loves who love her. Focus more on them.

M: I know it hurts to love or admire another but who doesn’t feel the same way you do. Do yourself a favor, Janelle. Try to forget about ending up with Dino. I know the feelings won’t be gone soon; they will ebb and flow like the waves. But as the saying goes, “you can’t stop the waves, but you can learn to surf.” Swim away before it’s too late. And since it’s summer, head out to the beach and get some vitamin sea!

DJ: It’s been said that rejection temporarily lowers our IQ, believe it or not. But in time, her hurts will melt with the heat of summer, bit by bit, like chops falling off an ice sculpture. She is a human being, beautiful and special in her own irreplaceable Janelle way. Her loved ones have realized that. It’s time that she did!